Cheers to another New Year of motherhood! Motherhood is hard. If you follow my blog, then you know that I am very open about my struggle as a mom, and have even referred to my son as a monster (here). That being said, it is also the most awesome job on the planet. I spent so many years trying to figure out what I was passionate about and how I could make an impact on this world; and then I had my son. The first time I held Hudson, I realized the immense amount of pressure that came with being a mother. It is my responsibility to raise this little baby. It is my job to ensure that this teeny human grows up to be the kind of man I will be proud of. As someone who sometimes feels like I don’t even have my own life together, I feared that I would fail trying to raise someone else.
I am not a failure.
In the last year, I have learned to ignore the voices in my head telling me I can’t do it. I defend my decisions as a mother instead of questioning them. I refuse to give in to negative thoughts and opinions. I am a good mother.
As a new year begins, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how I can be a better mother. What little steps can I take that will make a big difference in Hudson’s life? How can I better myself in ways that will impact my family in a positive way? How can I be the best version of myself this year? I recently wrote a post about creating your own happiness and I think that is a great place to start for moms who need a little boost this year! I’ve also created this list of ways that I plan on becoming a better mother in 2017!
- Be More Present: We are busy. We have cell phones and social media and televisions and i-pads and every thing at our fingertips in todays society. It’s easy to be there but not be present. I am so ashamed by the amount of time I spend doing other things in front of Hudson. This year, I want to put my phone away and be present. I want to roll around on the floor with my son instead of taking pictures of him playing on the floor. Moms, let’s be present.
- Focus On Me: No, this doesn’t mean take myself shopping once a month. It means giving myself 15 minutes a day to think about my goals. I have been using this Daily Greatness Journal to help me keep track of my thoughts and goals regarding parenting. It reminds me daily that taking care of myself is just as important as taking care of my family. It’s so crucial to have time for yourself for reflection and meditation.
- Set Goals: I’m not a spreadsheet girl. I take things as they come and more often than not, I regret not having better planner. That’s why this year one of my goals is to get organized and set goals! I even bought a planner (that’s a big deal. I don’t know how to use it)! So this year, i’m going to think ahead, plan ahead, and be more successful because I want Hudson to see me as strong and motivated, not as last minute and unprepared!
- Find Alternatives For No: The older Hudson gets, the more he’s learning how to push my buttons. All of them. I need to take a step back and breathe sometimes. I want to be slow to anger with my son (and my husband) and that means letting go of the reigns a bit and realising that ya know what, he’s a toddler and he’s going to do annoying things like throw your keys in the toilet. I don’t want him to remember me as an angry mother. I want him to remember me as patient and loving. That being said, I want to focus on saying, hey, lets try throwing mummy’s keys in her purse instead of the toilet rather than saying, NO!
- Laugh More: As moms we put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect that we forget that we only get to live this life once. Don’t put so much pressure on yourself. Do the best you can and do it with a smile. When life hands you lemons, truck on and smile. Don’t look back on these years as the “hard years” like we so often hear our parents say, look back at them as the fun years!
I hope you leave today inspired to carry on being the amazing mother i’m sure you already are. Let’s not forget, our kids think we are super heroes even on our WORST days. That’s the best part about being a mom; the unconditional love that comes with the job title.
Happy New Year!